Stavros Krysiak aka Anh Minh posted:

That would be the story of Ong Ve Singh, which appears below.
I cannot caution you enough not to sit on an American
Standard and meditate unless you are well prepared. The first
time it happen to me when there was no newspaper to read.
Instead i stayed the now. It was one glorious shit.  I was so
excited that I burst through the bathroom door screaming "I
have seen God."  My wife quickly dial 911. I spend the next
few days in Bellview trying to convince them that i did see
god. A few days latter I had my second enlightenment while
sitting on an American Standard. It was, "Don't ever let
anyone know that you had an enlightenment on the toilet."
After that they released me."
 
And now the repost Ong Ve Singh:
 
The story of the enlightenment of ONG VE SINH.  Old Anh Minh
had just finished a wonderful dinner and as he smoked his
after dinner cigar he felt the need to go. This turned out
not to be an ordinary shit.  It was a long well formed stool
that felt so good that he was instantaneously enlightened.
Once enlightened he was Buddha.  He took on the enlightened
name Ong Ve Sinh (Mr. Bathroom).  His following consisted of
the best shitters in the Western World.  After he died they
followed the path, in which they were well trained.  The only
teaching was to enjoy a good shit and that any shit could be
a good shit.  They built a temple for him in Budapest. In the
temple there was  a large room with many toilets for
worshipers to sit and meditate.  Toilets came in all sizes
and shapes to make the most comfortable fit for each
individual worshipper.  But soon new converts looked towards
a new leader in the sect of shit.  This master started
digging into the past and looking at the life of Ong Ve Sinh
in order to attain instant enlightenment without going
through any enlightening process. He was looking for the
secret of instant shit. It was discovered that Ong Ve Sinh
sat on an American Standard Toilet, when he was enlightened.
This made all of the toilets in the Budapest Temple
unacceptable.  It was declared "unless you sit on  a American
Standard Toilet, enlightenment will not be possible."
Further probing  revealed that the meal that Ong Ve Sinh had
before his enlightening shit consisted of American Junk food.
Since American junk food wasn't available in Budapest the new
enlightened masters  came up with "imitation American junk
food." There will also was a run on Havana cigars.  Since Ong
Ve Sinh was fond of Havana Cigars, it was assumed that he was
smoking one of them when he was enlightened.  Furthermore, it
was determined that Ong Ve Sinh had exactly 36 hairs on his
ass.  Monks plucked the hairs of their ass until only 36 were
left.  The emphasis of study shifted from having a good shit
to producing and exceptionally long shit.  Priests prided
themselves in producing 12 in long shits that become know as
foot-stools.  "Have a good shit" was the ultimate answer to
any question brought to the monks.  "My wife left me and my
business failed What am I doing wrong?" a householder asked.
The answer from the master was "It's because you don't know
how to shit.  Have a good long hard  shit and everything will
be yours." In a great tribute to Ong Ve Sinh an image of him
on his American standard was carved out of petrified shit and
placed in the temple.  It was not godly to smell like shit
for it was pronounced that Ong Ve Sinh's shit didn't stink.
Those with colitis were considered to be suffering from a
lack of spirituality.  After all who could enjoy a runny
shit. And thus the teaching of a great god which was merely
"to enjoy a good shit" was turned to shit.  The sect died off
in Budapest.  Today few could even remember his name but
throughout the world and occasionally in Budapest people are
still having enlightening experiences when they shit.