Discourses of the Alt.buddhites


P.K. the H. asked:
>Hmmmm...Do the French smell?

kjnl@aol.com (KJNL) replied:
>Yes, generally with their noses.

but, watters@primenet.com (Pete Watters) replied:
>They can't. They're too busy talking through their noses.

and Rosey F(antastik) T. proposed:
>I suggest that this be the next topic of debate, as the "Nam myho blah
>blah blah" discussion is getting old and worn out.  So, do the French
>smell with their noses, or are they unable to, as their noses are too
>occupied with talking?

and Zenkatsu (Rabbit) Pugh revealed the French Nose Teaching:

Actually, as is clear from the Loo Too Sutra, both of these ideas
are heresies propounded by the enemies of the Soaking Gekko.  In
fact, the French nose is firmly stuck in other people's business,
and therefore unavailable for either talking or smelling.  To wit:

      "And then spoke the Wholly Gekko, yeah, according to
       the merits and understanding of the congregation, saying, 
       'look you twits, I'm gonna lay it down where even apathetic 
       shlubs like you can get at it.  What do French noses do?
       French noses stick themselves
       where they shouldn't be stuck.  Don't go giving me none of
       this bulpuckey about smelling or talking!  I'm not gonna 
       buy it, and you don't either, or I'll have to have my pals
       the 'arahants' here rough youse up.  And where is it that
       these noses are stuck?  Well, I'll tell ya!  They're stuck
       in other countries' harbors, blowing up ships; they're stuck
       in other hemispheres' oceans, blowing up nuclear bombs; they're
       stuck in other countries politics, beating down popular
       rebellions and propping up tinhorn dictators.  And that ain't
       the half of it, so get it straight!'"

      "Thus, having completed the recitation in the hall, the Wholly
       Gekko shook his mighty head in disgust, and gathering his 
       enforcers, as many as grains of sand in all the Ganges rivers
       of a billions Buddha worlds, about him, he departed from the
       assembly."